Sadfishing: Posts Charged With Emotional Anguish

The sadfishing defines a complex behavior we’ve all seen on more than one occasion. There are people who publish phrases, texts or expressions with distressing and even worrying emotional content on their social networks. Things like “life has no meaning” are common, “it is clear that no one cares about me and that I am more and more alone” or worse still “if I disappeared surely no one would care.”

In certain cases, when reading these types of messages, one thinks that what that person is really looking for is to attract attention. And at times, it can be so. However, experts are paying attention to these types of realities that are increasingly appreciated in the online world.

How do you know if a person is really asking for help? How to discriminate the attention seeker from who is reaching the limit of his strength? We are facing a phenomenon to which perhaps we should pay more attention. We analyze it.

Sadfishing, the sad publications of the online world

We are aware that our reality is often full of anglicisms and labels that are difficult to remember and even manage. However, this resource is useful for describing behaviors and situations that are new, especially when they come from the digital world and online. Thus, the sadfishing refers to the person making public their negative emotions and thoughts to your virtual community.

As we pointed out at the beginning, this is something that a good part of us have seen on numerous occasions. For that reason, if we are interested in this phenomenon, it is for two very specific facts.

• The first, to know how readers judge and process these types of messages.
• The second, due to the need to detect if the figure behind that message is really asking for help.

I’m here, I want you to pay attention to me

In one part of the cases, it’s just that: a wake-up call. It is like the child who rebukes adults, the voice that demands to be heard and that achieves it by appealing to the emotions. In this case, there is no desire for manipulation or deception, it is an exercise in catharsis to get someone to respond and validate you.

In recent months, and as a result of the pandemic, the confinements and the social crisis, the phenomenon of sadfishing has increased. Something we all know is that when the emotional is used, the usual empathy will respond.

For this reason, when we find publications of the type “I’m on the edge”, “all this is going to be able to me”, “every time I feel sadder” are attempts not only to attract attention, but also to find support. To perceive that others also feel the same as you and that you are not alone.

Young people between 14 and 22 years old are the ones who practice sadfishing the most (and they must be validated)

When in doubt as to whether someone is only looking to attract attention with their message or if they are really asking for help, it is always better to stay with the second and respond. It costs nothing to ask that person if they need something. It never hurts to contact the person who has written that sentence full of emotional anguish privately and ask you if you want to talk to us about anything.

Studies, such as those carried out by the pediatric department at Providence St. Joseph Health in Washington, show us something relevant. A large part of young people between the ages of 14 and 22 who suffer from depression or anxiety see social networks as the only way to have contact with others. Therefore, the messages they post are genuine calls for help.

The best recommendation is to always respond to whoever publishes this type of message

The Internet is our window to the world. We have reached a point where social networks are the best loudspeaker for many things and there are those who even use them as a mechanism to vent thoughts and needs. Today’s young people make this medium their language, their channel and their refuge and this is something that we cannot ignore.

Faced with practices such as sadfishing, it is very difficult to differentiate what is true from what is not. Therefore, it is important to reflect on the following:

• The best response to these situations is to communicate privately with that person and offer support.
• When responding to these messages loaded with emotional anguish, let’s avoid resorting to mere sympathy. We do not stay with a like or with a “the same thing happens to me “. Let’s use empathy. Phrases like “I’m sorry about what you’re going through. How can I help you?” they are the most successful in these situations.

The danger of posting how we feel on social media

Not good. It is not recommended. Better not to. When we are going through an adverse and negative moment, it is not appropriate to make our feelings public on social networks. It is not for a number of reasons. The first because that fingerprint is not going to be erased and everything expressed will be public.

The second, because trolls exist, because there are those who will use that against us and almost without realizing it can ridicule what we have written to humiliate us. This can further aggravate our suffering. Thus, the third reason why it is not good to do this type of publication is because not everyone is qualified to give us advice.

Someone with all their good intentions may say or propose something to us that actually makes us feel worse. After all, what we need most in these circumstances is understanding and support. It is better if the real help is provided by the experts.

To conclude, we can only focus once more on the above. Let’s not ignore these types of messages, let’s not ignore them or leave them in sight. Sometimes, the one who needs the most is the one who shouts the least and writes the most where he shouldn’t: on his Twitter or Facebook wall.