Anxiety And Low Self-esteem: Are They Related?

Anxiety and low self-esteem have a relationship that directly affects other dimensions, such as the state of mind or the projects in which we embark. Thus, a common fact is to limit ourselves to making use of certain techniques to manage stress and anxiety disorders, overlooking a very specific trigger. After that anguish, after that uneasiness and adverse symptoms, inhabits a mind accustomed to sabotaging itself.

The cognitive psychotherapist Albert Ellis pointed out with great success that one of the most common causes of anxiety is self-demand. The anxious mind is always afraid of falling short, of failing, of showing fallibility or imperfection. Now, in this process in which so many anxieties accumulate for not complying, it is easy to gradually derive the idea that if we do not reach certain goals it is because we cannot or do not deserve them.

Behind the anxiety is in many cases helplessness. This is something to keep in mind, because when the vision we have of ourselves is fractured, fears, insecurities and the inability to manage life itself enter through these veins.

Anxiety and low self-esteem, the causes that explain this relationship

It would be enough to do a small survey to discover how many people who deal with an anxiety disorder also do so with the burden of low self-esteem. If we could immerse ourselves in the rumor of their thoughts and the internal dialogue that flows in their minds, we would also discover several things.

The first would be the excess of phrases that start in the same way ‘ I can’t control my anxiety’, ‘I don’t have the skills to cope with this’, ‘I better avoid doing this because it’s not worth it and it sure goes wrong’, ‘I don’t like my physique, I don’t like that other of me ”, and so on. The second striking aspect that we would find would be the following. Many people end up using anxiety as a shield to avoid dealing with the original problem: low self-esteem.

Thus, it is common for them to make comments or reasoning such as the following: I do not show up for that job interview because anxiety is not going to leave me. I do not stay with that person that I like because in the end my anxiety will spoil everything. In these cases, they are not aware that the original root of their own anxiety and those thoughts is insecurity and low self-esteem.

Let’s see below more explanations that justify the relationship between anxiety and low self-esteem.

The eternal fear of rejection

An enhancer of good self-esteem is undoubtedly having had a proper upbringing. Enjoying a positive attachment to parents, feeling safe and loved is an essential nutrient. All this undoubtedly generates also having a positive vision of oneself and, in this way, we are building a strong and healthy identity and self-concept.

Now, when this fails, almost everything falls apart. Having had a difficult childhood and even having suffered bullying often originates that eternal fear of rejection. That anguish, the fear of being rejected again at any time (whether emotionally, at work, etc.) ends up shaping subsequent anxiety disorders.

The relationship between low self-esteem and perfectionism

An interesting study was carried out at Curtin University in Australia. In it, Dr. Sarah Egan showed that there is a significant relationship between perfectionism, anxiety and low self-esteem. What’s more, this link is often seen in eating disorders.

Anxiety and low self-esteem are often reflected in our need to show efficiency and perfection in everything we do. However, doubts and insecurity soon appear, as well as that self-restraint of someone who doubts himself and what he has done with great effort. All of these situations lead to frustration and anxiety.

The mind that only focuses on the negative side of things

The mind is often held captive by that cognitive and emotional focus where light, courage, or optimism rarely enter. It is that tunnel vision where there is no glimpse other than fatalism or failure. Behind this personal vision is the seed of low self-esteem, a germ that coexists for years in us and that little by little is building the prison of anxiety.

It is not easy to emerge from these psychological states. Often times, anxiety and low self-esteem create a permanent alloy where it is very difficult to liberate the person. When such deep mental patterns have been created, it is not easy to break that mold to show those who suffer that it is in their power to generate a change, improve well-being.

However, such a craft can be done. And the way to start that improvement is by working on self-appreciation. When we improve the vision we have of ourselves, an advance is created. The moment you bet on yourself again, adding ingredients such as confidence, security, illusion and a vital purpose to the day by day, fears fall and with them, the structure of anxiety.

We all have the ability and potential to invest in that process. Self-esteem is after all, that muscle that moves everything and that gives movement and light to life.