What To Do When You Feel Like They Compete Against You?
Western society is marked by strong competition that extends to all areas of life, thus creating the unpleasant feeling that others are competing against you. What to do then when this feeling produces stress?
Either by a perception towards the attitudes of others or by your own competitiveness, if this bothers you, here are some keys to make it more bearable. Do not miss it.
Competitive self-esteem
Although the individualistic recommendation to be unique and not worry about other people is already common in our culture, there is another contradictory current that tries to motivate towards the outstanding, to be the best at something. These two forces often force a choice between collaboration and competition.
When there is a competitive environment, you may feel that others are trying to outdo you even though you are not competing with them. This can cause feelings of pressure, threat, and even anxiety or low self-esteem. It can even modify how you interpret the attitudes of others, leading you to think that they are competing against you when in reality they are not.
What to do when you feel like they are competing against you?
In the case of competitive personalities, this need for improvement can be focused in two different directions: oneself or others. It is in the latter case when you can feel that others compete against you, which can shake your self-esteem when you see where others can surpass you.
Therefore, the interpretation of the competitive attitude plays a fundamental role in creating discomfort when other people want to share certain aspects or activities in our life. The key is that self-esteem ends up becoming dependent on the successes that are had over others.
Are you reading this article because you feel like others are competing against you and you think it could be an interpretation? If so, here are some tips to help you dig deeper.
Normalizes competitiveness
Competitiveness is not bad as long as it does not become something that fosters envy and threat. Instead, it can be used to improve oneself by changing the focus of self-improvement.
Competitiveness can be a game, a spark to get a little better each time, rather than just winning or losing. In fact, defeats can be a source of motivation to keep going rather than fear.
Change the focus of your competition
If the attitude of competition – yours or that of others – is starting to make your self-esteem falter, it is time to redirect your desire for victory.
Look for the fun in which others compete against you
As we said above, if you approach competitiveness as if it were a game, you will find it much more relaxed than if you treat it as if it were an obligation. This is very useful to remove the unhealthy connotation that makes others and oneself suffer.
De-dramatizes
Take another spin on the fact that there are people trying to outdo you – having someone look at your successes is actually a good thing. That gives us the ability to motivate others or start the path for something that produces change through collaboration.
This is related to another idea: competing and cooperating are not incompatible. If you spend time cooperating to overcome your own limits, the overall result will be even greater.
Beware of perfectionism
If you are a very competitive person, it may seem like the only way to win is to surpass someone and reach a point where no one can reach higher. Perfection does not exist and seeking it can become an obsession. When you get to this point, you may feel frustration and other negative energy-consuming emotions that you could be using to improve healthily.
As you can see, competing can be healthy and even fun. If you ever feel like others are competing against you, you might even be someone capable of mobilizing people, so give it another thought.
